“I know I’m lazy with the little things”

February 18, 2007

Ba Be Bi Bo Bu

Filed under: Uncategorized — stuckinreverse @ 10:24 am

I am going to be faced with another tough thirty minutes (if I’m lucky) of my life later tonight. Tough meaning…? Meaning this: Teaching my five year-old nephew to read. I have the suspicion he’s hyperactive but I’m keeping my mouth shut about it, lest I want to incite chaos in our household. Trying to hold his focus is like pulling out a tooth with a thread and a doorknob. Only the tooth is, like, a bazillion times cuter. How hard could it be to teach a five year-old how to read? You might ask me that. Let me give you a few instances on how hard it was:

01. I told him “F” sounds like “fa.” I drilled it into his head, saying “fa fa fa fa fa!” countless times. When I ran out of breath, he looked at me with those sweet, wide dark eyes and said, “Like fart?” And then he made a farting sound with his lips against his arm. That kid, he’s going to kill me, I swear.

02. I pointed to him H. I said, “This is letter H, okay? H as in ‘ha’!” To which he promptly replied, “Ho ho ho! Like Santa Clause?” And then he proceeded to sing, “Jingle bells, jingle bells…” He didn’t give me any time to cut him off until he finished the song.

I’m ready to quarantine both of us in a cave, where the walls would be painted with alphabets. And if he still prefers to pick imaginary dirt on his nails, I would haul him off to the mountains, find a waterfall and toss him there. While he’s falling, I’m going to yell, “You’re falling! Faaalling. F-f-f-falling. What letter is that and what sound?” Maybe that will get through to him.

Say, does anyone here know a site which gives out a free Conor Oberst layout? Or even just layout graphics? I could just code it myself. Please, leave a comment if you know someone. Thanks right now, sent to the future! =)

P.S. I would like to thank Jen for her comment regarding my poem. That’s one of the nicest, nicest things anyone ever said to me, online and offline. Thank you, Jen! *gives you a gum*



  1. I know how hard it is because I have a five year old brother. I felt a little rewarded for my and my mother’s hard work when he got an award for “improved reading” though.


    Comment by Amber — February 18, 2007 @ 11:09 am

  2. LOL!! =D Oh my gosh, that made me laugh oh so very much. Wow, how terribly tricky O.O
    haha, my mother attempted to give me a reading lesson =D I don’t think it turned out too well xP

    ^^Steady is the exact word I was looking for. Although I feel better today 🙂 so you never know eh?!

    ^^Manners! Yes that’s the one, I wish people wouldn’t swear and were more polite… but we can’t change the world, only ourselves 🙂

    Comment by Olivia — February 18, 2007 @ 11:20 am

  3. Oh don’t worry i don’t see ghosts i hear them o.o lol and chocolate is love. Teaching a 5 year old to read has to be fun xD i hope you have better luck w. that because it doesn’t sound like its going to well =)

    Comment by Nez — February 18, 2007 @ 6:36 pm

  4. No problem, as far as the comment about that lovely poem goes 🙂
    Big problem with the getting a five year old hyperactive nephew to read. My nephew’s going to be 7 in April….so I know the deal. We should definitely do the cave and waterfall technique!

    He got older though, and he sort of seems to want to read now. A little bit. Like…he writes notes to me and everyone else :

    (imagine backwards and screwed up e’s and a’s)Dear Lenny,

    he used to write it “Dear Lenny, I luvv euw”

    So there’s hope for the future! When he’s in school he’ll wanna start to read and write well. 🙂

    Comment by Jen — February 18, 2007 @ 7:43 pm

  5. Ahh lmao I would never be able to teach a kid how to read so I respect you for doing it 😛

    Comment by Raye — February 18, 2007 @ 8:03 pm

  6. Aww, it sounds so cute – in the way that might drive you crazy 😛 At least you have the knowledge that you’ve helped him somewhat 😛

    And hehe, I will tag you for that quizzy thing, I need to go edit my blog 😛

    Comment by Eilidh — February 18, 2007 @ 11:11 pm

  7. Oh man. Nearly all kids make it their life goal to be difficult. He does sound like a hyperactive child. Many are rather unfocused at that age though.

    Comment by Scott — February 19, 2007 @ 8:38 pm

  8. and the sad part is, he probably won’t even remember the torture he put you through when he’s older. I can’t remember learning to read or write :-/

    Comment by Kelsey — February 19, 2007 @ 9:49 pm

  9. O.O
    Oh my gosh. I would NOT have the patience for that little kid. I’d be like, screaming and running around the room to burn off excess steam, lest I’d do something drastic. O.O

    I’ve never read “The Elephant Vanishes”- what’s it about? I’m always into learning more about new spiffy books. ^_^

    Comment by McKenna — February 20, 2007 @ 7:33 am

  10. Aww, it’s really tough teaching kids to read but eventually it just … happens and once they have it all the effort is totally worthwhile. He sounds absolutely adorable, lol.

    Comment by Natasha — February 20, 2007 @ 12:27 pm

  11. Thanx for the comment 🙂
    Aww, he sounds adorable. =P A handful…but still adorable xD
    And maybe in ten years time you’ll have a meaningful conversation with him and it’ll all be worthwhile xD
    And your layout is so cute. making me hungry though xD

    Comment by Jo — February 20, 2007 @ 12:50 pm

  12. I’ve done the exact same thing. I found it easier if you don’t drill it into them and make it seem more like a game. And let him tell you what the letter and sound is. And then when he gets it right praise him like there is no tomorrow.

    Comment by Eean — February 23, 2007 @ 3:24 pm

  13. Somehow i missed the point. Probably lost in translation 🙂 Anyway … nice blog to visit.

    cheers, Enuresis.

    Comment by Enuresis — June 19, 2008 @ 1:11 am

  14. I love your site! 🙂

    Experiencing a slow PC recently? Fix it now!

    Comment by Michael Tim — February 28, 2009 @ 7:28 pm

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